Recently

I have been rather busy, on Friday I went to beaulieu (yes I had to look up the spelling of that) it was great fun, we went on the monorail and on the old bus. we also went into the house and the Abby. The whole place was strangely un-accessible tho it did make me wonder how they got away with it, there appeared to be rather limited wheelchair access. only a few of there steps where marked...which was hazardous, there where lots of overhanging bushes and my most embarrassing "they could have done better on the access front" moment was there doors, when you pay for your entrance in to beaulieu you walk through a set of clear glass doors, I did not realise they where there! Anyway moan over it was really fun we had ice cream looked round gardens, got stuff blown every were in the cafe, went on a slightly scary monorail and looked at nice cars. we also went on the wheel thing where you look at the history of cars was really cool.

Then on Friday evening I went back to my friends and we played swing ball and a bit of catch and then had a very lush Chinese, it was a really lovely day!

Then on Saturday I went to a family anniversary party all my dads side of the family where there and it was my half-cousin's 5th wedding anniversary and it was really fun, I spent a lot of time holding some very sweet baby's, and giving them back when it was toilet time, did do quite a lot of nose wiping tho!

To be honest I'm writing this trying to hang on to those good things, I've been pretty down and alone, even wen I'm with other people

I'm finding the holidays harder than I thought, I never for a million years thought I would say these words but I'm missing college. At college there are places to go, things to be done, people to talk to and most importantly it's a reason to get up in the morning, to make myself get up.

Anyway I'm doing better than I was on the last anti-depressants I think these ones might actually be helping....so we will see how it goes...only time will tell.

To end on a positive note, I'm going away on Tuesday!!! its only to slough which is most peoples idea of the most hellish holiday destination ever but I'm going to see my auntie and her partner and her dog so its good :D

messy

Well me and my... What to call him.... It's a very new relationship...erm boyfriend, went on a date last week. We went for lunch and then back to mine(briefly) and then to the beach and a really nice little cafe which my friend owns/ manages to get ice cream, then on to the local park.

Whilst surveying the various offerings of iced delight, I had to consider not just the taste but the likely hood of me spilling it everywhere and the possible embarrassment this would cause, so i decided to be safe and go for a Ribina ice(other brands are available). "It's in cardboard I can't possibly spill that can I?"- I thought away merrily to myself.

Well to my boyfriends amusement I got purple blackcurrant everywhere all over my white top, and very sticky hands. A couple of people sitting opposite saw me spill it and laughed at me. I went to the toilet to try and clean up a bit, that was hugely unscessful. I had to walk home with blackcurrant stains all over my white top!

The worst thing about this was it wasn't even because of my disability so I couldn't use that as an excuse, my boyfriend (for want of a better expression) is also visually impaired and he didn't spill any. I'm sure the ability to spill ice cream cant be linked to my mental health issues, or my issues (yes i ahve lots of issues) with balance...but ...yes I've cracked it an excuse for looking like a small child and a fool.

Are you ready?...Sure?

The nature of my visual impairment leaves me unable to judge distances thus my co-ordination is impaired!

yes a justified reason for making a mess! I love it!