Signing off!

I'm heading into the dark age abyss that is Gosport at the moment.

Don't get be wrong I really enjoy going back home and seeing all the people and places I know, catching up with friends, dog walks and a coffee by the sea, but recent events have plunged Gosport back into the dark ages.

Some cretins have been going around Gosport in a no doubt dirty white van stealing peoples phone cables. My house is one of around eight thousand that has been affected.

Some would say this is the credit crunch rearing its ugly head, forcing people into desperate measures around Christmas. 

I'm understandably annoyed by this I don't mean to sound in any way patronising but it has left my disabled mum without a phone line or internet connection for 14 days I think it is now.

I really can't think how someone that has gone around stealing phone cables just before christmas can live with there self. Its a horrible crime that has no doubt left thousands of possibly venerable people without a working phone, for many cheesy as it sounds it may be their lifeline.

BT have said they hope to have all the faults fixed and working again by Christmas day

On a different level it has pissed me off and will leave me rather disconnected with the online world I know and love so much so for possibly quite a long time this is Jemma Brown signing off!

I GOT A JOB

Ok excuse me for being incredibly hyper about this but wow I have managed to get myself a job.

 

Not only that but it’s a job I am feeling incredibly positive about; you are indeed reading the words of a volunteering ambassador!

 

I start in January and I am just so pleased about it.

 

Lets look at my employment history, its not great I have had one paid job which was the summer after my GCSE exams secured by my dad working in an office.

 

For every job I have ever applied for which must have been hundreds until now I received a negative response.

 

I had until now never had an interview for a job or anything. So my first interview for a job and what happens I get the job.

 

I have written on here about discrimination and the potential ways in which employers can avoid the disability discrimination act (DDA) previously and I am very pleased to report that I think maybe times are changing, maybe the DDA is having an effect, or maybe I am being naive

Ive done 76 out of the 132 stupid things (but I might have got the math wrong!)

Do this and repost it with the title:
I've done X out of the 132 stupid things.

(I'm not quite sure how some of these things are stupid, but never mind!)

Level 1
(x ) Smoked A Cigarette
( ) Smoked A Cigar
(x) Kissed A Member Of The Same Sex
(x) Drank Alcohol

SO FAR: 3

Level 2
(x) Are / Been In Love
(x) Been Dumped
( ) Shoplifted
( ) Been Fired
( ) Been In A Fist Fight

SO FAR: 5

Level 3
(x) Had A Crush On An Older Person
(x ) Skipped School 
( ) Slept With A Co-worker
(x) Seen Someone / Something Die

SO FAR: 8

Level 4
(x) Had / Have A Crush On One Of Your Facebook Friends
(x) Been To Paris (i'm going in January so it counts)
( ) Been To Spain
(x) Been On A Plane
( ) Thrown Up From Drinking

SO FAR: 11

Level 5
( ) Eaten Sushi
( ) Been Snowboarding
( ) Met Someone BECAUSE Of Facebook
( ) Been in a Mosh Pit

SO FAR: 11

Level 6
( ) Been In An Abusive Relationship
(x) Taken Pain Killers 
(x) Love/loved Someone Who You Can't Have
(x) Laid On Your Back And Watched Cloud Shapes Go By
(x) Made A Snow Angel

SO FAR: 15

Level 7
(x) Had A Tea Party
(x) Flown A Kite
(x) Built A Sand Castle
(x) Gone mudding
(x) Played Dress Up

SO FAR: 20

Level 8
(x) Jumped Into A Pile Of Leaves
(x) Gone Sledging
(x) Cheated While Playing A Game (the game WAS Cheat...)
(x) Been Lonely
(x) Fallen Asleep At Work / School

SO FAR: 25

Level 9
( ) Watched The Sun Set
( ) Felt An Earthquake
( ) Killed A Snake

SO FAR: 25

Level 10
(x) Been Tickled
( ) Been Robbed / Vandalized
( ) Been cheated on
(x) Been Misunderstood

SO FAR: 27

Level 11
(x) Won A Contest
( ) Been Suspended From School
(x) Had Detention
( ) Been In A Car / Motorcycle Accident 

SO FAR: 29

Level 12
( ) Had / Have Braces
(x) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
( ) Danced in the moonlight

SO FAR: 30

Level 13
(x) Hated The Way You Look 
(x) Witnessed A Crime
( ) Pole Danced
(x) Questioned Your Heart
(x) Been obsessed with post-it-notes

SO FAR: 34

Level 14
(x) Squished Barefoot Through The Mud
(x) Been Lost
( ) Been To The Opposite Side Of The World
(x) Swam In The Ocean
(x) Felt Like You Were Dying

SO FAR: 38

Level 15
(x) Cried Yourself To Sleep
(x) Played Cops And Robbers
(x) Recently Colored With Crayons / Colored Pencils / Markers
(x) Sang Karaoke (does Guitar Hero and Rock Band count?!)
(x) Paid For A Meal With Only Coins

SO FAR: 43

Level 16
(x) Done Something You Told Yourself You Wouldn't
( ) Made Prank Phone Calls
( ) Laughed Until Some Kind Of Beverage Came Out Of Your Nose
( ) Kissed In The Rain

SO FAR: 44

Level 17
(x) Written A Letter To Santa Claus
( ) Watched The Sun Set/ sun rise With Someone You Care/Cared About
(x) Blown Bubbles
(x) Made A Bonfire On The Beach or anywhere

SO FAR: 47

Level 18
( ) Crashed A Party
( ) Have Travelled More Than 5 Days With A Car Full Of People
( ) Gone Rollerskating / Blading
(x) Had A Wish Come True
( ) Been Humped By A Monkey (WTF?!)

SO FAR: 48

Level 19
( ) Worn Pearls (I don't suppose they were real)
( ) Jumped Off A Bridge
(x) Screamed "Penis" or "Vagina"
( ) Ridden an elephant

SO FAR:49

Level 20
(x) Got Your Tongue Stuck To A Pole/Freezer/ice Cube/ Ice Lolly
( ) Kissed A Fish
(x) Worn The Opposite Sex's Clothes
(x) Sat On A Roof Top

SO FAR: 52

Level 21
(x) Screamed At The Top Of Your Lungs 
( ) Done / Attempted A One-Handed Cartwheel
( ) Talked On The Phone For More Than 6 Hours
( ) Recently stayed up for a while talking to someone you care about

SO FAR: 53

Level 22
(x) Picked And Ate An Apple Right Off The Tree
(x) Climbed A Tree
(x) Had/Been In A Tree House
(x) Been scared To Watch Scary Movies Alone

SO FAR: 58

Level 23
(x) Believed In Ghosts
( ) Have had More Then 30 Pairs Of Shoes
( ) Gone Streaking
( ) Visited Jail

SO FAR: 59

Level 24
( ) Played Chicken
( ) Been Pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
(x) Been Told You're Hot By A Complete Stranger
(x) Broken A Bone
(x) Been Easily Amused

SO FAR: 62

Level 25
( ) Caught A Fish Then Ate It Later
( ) Made A Porn Video/got asked to make one
( ) Caught A Butterfly
(x) Laughed So Hard You Cried
(x) Cried So Hard You Laughed

SO FAR: 64

Level 26
(x) Mooned/Flashed Someone
(x) Had Someone Moon/Flash You
(x) Cheated On A Test
(x) Forgotten Someone's Name
( ) French Braided Someone's Hair
(x) Gone Skinny Dipping (not since I was a kid, mind you!)
( ) Been Kicked Out Of Your House
(x) Tried to hurt yourself

SO FAR: 70

Level 28
(x) Rode A Roller Coaster
( ) Went Scuba-Diving/Snorkeling
(x) Had A Cavity
( ) Black-Mailed Someone
( ) Been Black Mailed

SO FAR: 72

Level 29
(x) Been Used
(x) Fell Going Up The Stairs
( ) Licked A Cat
(x) Bitten Someone
(x) Licked Someone

SO FAR: 76

Level 30
( ) Been shot at/or at gunpoint
( ) Had sex in the rain
( ) Flattened someone's tyres
( ) Rode your car/truck until the gas light came on
( ) Got five quid or less worth of gas 

TOTAL: 76

sleep

I came home so I could get some good uninterrupted quality sleep.

I did not sleep!

What is worse is that i think I no why, I usually take my lovely antidepressant every morning, yesterday I forgot and took it about 8 PM .

I was still awake at 5 am this morning.

I feel really crap today!

Scrapbooking *THIS POST CONTAINS LANGUAGE THAT SOME PEOPLE MY FIND OFFENSIVE*

In the last few weeks I have discovered that there is indeed a new type of craft activity that I dislike, it is the art of the scrapbook.

I will say right now from the start that I have always been rubbish at anything vaguely artistic or crafty.

I’m a Guide leader that hates craft activities, which may well be a rarity.

My lack of talent in the craft department is not something that I’m really bothered about. Lets face it everyone is crap at something; some people are crap at lots of things. I’m crap at any activity requiring pens, pencils, wool, glue, glitter, fuzzy felt, paint or any other craft material.

As a child at school it used to bother me that my painting was not as good as anyone else’s, or that my roman chariot looked like a penguin- now I’m fine with my crapness I accept and love it as an individual feature of me.

My lack of crafty artisticness does occasionally cause me frustration. I can’t sow for example which is a relatively common skill that the vast majority of the population possesses. It is also a skill I find people assume I can do, I’m not entirely sure whether that is some deep routed stereotype that every woman in the land can sow, o the fat that I am a guide leader. Either way people are often shocked when it arises that I cannot sow. Even my totally blind mother can hand sow and does the majority of my sowing, so its not even that I can say its because of my disability I’m just crap at it!

So anyway I went off on a bit of a tangent there I am currently involved in a project that requires me to make a scrapbook.

Scrapbooking I have recently discovered is both an activity I do not particularly enjoy, one that I find very difficult and that realistically I am crap at. (After all making a scrapbook requires craft skills)

I can also conclude that scrapbooking is also a dangerous activity; I have indeed sustained a scrapbook injury.

Whilst cooking on Monday evening I burnt my thumb, it was quite a nasty one there was the sizzle and the smell of burning flesh, still there was no blood and after some time under the cold tap all was well until….

Later on in the evening whilst adding to my scrapbook I got UHU on my burn.

For those that don’t know UHU is a solvent-based glue that can stick anything. 

I used UHU because its good at sticking things together as its very sticky but when it dries I can peel off the large amounts of it that I get all over the place.

Unfortunately getting it on the area of burnt flesh and subsequently peeling it off was not good.

In short I peeled off the glue and a lot of skin came off with it. (That does not normally happen)

Lesson learned don’t attempt to do anything crafty if you already know you are crap at it.

Ouch! The Streets, and a bit about me

[Wow yet again it appears to be quite some time since I last blogged, I really am getting lazy so am as of now going to commit to keeping my blog up to date.]

 

Ouch!

I have no excuses now for not keeping the blog up to date, the Ouch! Guest blogging program has been put to an end with the redesign of there website, so I am no longer writing for Ouch! I still have a webcam that technically belongs to them so you may well see me on Ouch! again in the future. 

Talking of Ouch! they have recently re designed there website and I would encourage anyone involved in web design to go and take a look at what a fully accessible website CAN look like. 

Lots of websites these days claim to be accessible to people that are visually impaired by offering the option of changing the text size, however in most cases this completely messes with the page layout text becomes crowded and overlaps other areas of text and usually becomes unreadable, the Ouch! website with its new design is fabulous!

The Streets 

Ok a band I'm really loving at the moment would have to be The streets, for anyone that has not heard there audio album offering I would seriously recommend it there album, is titled 'Everything is borrowed’ It’s really worth a listen. One of the, I think lesser-known tracks on the album is this one the lyrics of which I have copied and pasted especially for you!

The strongest person I know - The Streets

One of the first things about you I did see

Is that you verse your views quietly

When nature verses truths I get violent feelings

But softly time will reply that's wise

 

A delicate gesture of why you see

The best route through this being right through here

But met with a cute blind snide of fear

Best to go along with their idea

 

But , you gently take things slowly

You softly bowl them over

That’s the delicate way you’ve shown me

You’re the strongest person I know

 

You gently take things slowly

You softly bowl them over

That’s the delicate way you’ve shown me

You’re the strongest person I know

 

After taking the worst route, blatantly

Bang on cue we manage losing way

But in a squirmy backed and screwed up way

They actually managed passing you the blame

 

With that mad man wrapped with rage

Even then your temper stays exactly the same

And in that manner is the manner you stay

Beautiful person that's happily unchanged

 

You gently take things slowly

You softly bowl them over

That’s the delicate way you’ve shown me

You’re the strongest person I know

 

You gently take things slowly

You softly bowl them over

That’s the delicate way you’ve shown me

You’re the strongest person I know

 

In the heat of speech

Your words improve

Right out of reach in my stirred up words

But every time they f**king blurt out drool

I’m noticing they're all learning from you

 

Cos even though they know they cursed you

They should’ve admitted that they were fools

The next time they're wanting to work things through

The very first person they turn to is you

 

Cos you gently take things slowly

You softly bowl them over

That’s the delicate way you’ve shown me

You’re the strongest person I know

 

You gently take things slowly

You softly bowl them over

That’s the delicate way you’ve shown me

You’re the strongest person I know

 

You gently take things slowly

You softly bowl them over

That’s the delicate way you’ve shown me

You’re the strongest person I know

 

On a personal level

Well how am I? Now there is an intriguing question! I have had a few problems of late with my existing bone condition; in short my knee is playing up quite substantially. Approximately 2 years ago now I had a seriously large amount of physiotherapy on the knee in question, the effects of which would appear to have completely worn off. So here I am again feeling old beyond my years and in pain. I have now seen a doctor who has unfortunately not done a lot about it other than give me a prescription for 5 lots of Tubigrip and painkillers.

 

My problem with this is that its not going to sort out the long term issue (I am aware that nothing will do this completely), painkillers can become addictive and don’t alleviate all the pain very often and Tubigrip is fine as a temporary thing but the way the doctor suggested I should start wearing it all the time. This is a problem because Tubigrip is very flexible and elastic, it does not stay where it is put and with the knee joint in particular it creases up in the bend of the knee and digs in causing more pain.

 

Technicalities aside it is still essentially the same thing my bone condition and joints deteriorating, I’m not going to try and be upbeat about it, I’m going to be honest and say it’s a real blow, particularly as I have just started playing blind cricket again.

 

Other than all that I am doing ok, at the moment struggling slightly with a complete lack of creativity but I will get through that.

 

It could be worse

I keep reminding myself of this little mantra

It could be worse

University begins

University life has begun I'm two weeks in now and thought I would share with you all the slide presentation that somebody made of our breaking news day.

Breaking news day was a mock up terrorist attack on a gas storage facility in Warsash! We interviewed eye witnesses, attended a press conference and then rushed back to produce the finished article.

Gus and I are settling in well to university life, unfortunately Gus has had a bit of a bumpy start and is at the moment temporally out of action but enjoying putting his paws up with nanny and granddad!